There’s a saying that money makes the world go round. Talking about it is another matter. While 66% of Americans believe more open conversations about money are the key to financial freedom – speaking candidly about their own finances remains hushed.*

Money talk remains taboo across almost every aspect of modern society: economically, educationally, culturally. Americans are constantly planning (64%) and dreaming (58%) about their future, saying they’re often thinking about finances (61%) – but that’s where it goes silent.

Over six in 10 Americans (62%) don’t talk about money. Mum’s the word with their family (63%), friends (75%), and even with their spouse/partner (46%). Many people would rather discuss politics (43%) and death (32%) than their finances (24%). Millennials (56%) and Gen Z (49%) are less guarded, free with money topics compared to older generations (38% Gen X and 22% Boomers), and twice as likely to say they’re an “open book” (28% vs. 13%).

People may not be talking, but they are searching. In 2022, more Americans searched Google for “how to buy I bonds” and “how to be rich” than “how to be smart.” Nearly all survey respondents professed they have questions about money (86%), with how to make more (67%), and how much to save for retirement (63%) topping the list. Given the space to ask, respondents poured out their most burning questions, seeking answers to pressing and profound money worries like, “How do I save for the future when there are so many things to save for?” 

The survey revealed that the very questions people have are the ones they’re holding back on: Americans wonder how much money they should invest in the market (26%), yet 49% say they never talk about investing. One in 5 are curious how to pay down debt (19%), but 36% confess they don’t talk about debt. Paradoxically, money is on the mind, but it’s not on the tip of the tongue.

The story of money can be complicated, and roots run deep, all the way back to our earliest years. A majority of Americans surveyed (61%) say they never learned about personal finance in school, and half (52%) say that money wasn’t talked about at home or growing up. Respondents report they’ve been raised without practical, critical money lessons like budgeting (32%), saving for retirement (21%), negotiating a salary (18%), or investing (17%). Rather, the biggest lesson they say they were taught is money doesn’t buy happiness (48%). Yet, when asked to define “financial freedom” people tend to equate the two, saying it means “having a comfortable lifestyle” (50%) and being debt-free (54%). To a third of people, financial freedom is just as much about being able to go on vacation when you want (28%) as it is about the classic American dream of owning a home (29%).

In a society where “money talk” is ingrained in people’s everyday lives – we sing along to lyrics about making paper on our playlists, binge watch reality TV shows about America’s most wealthy, and scroll through social timelines filled with influencers popular enough to sell out products overnight – Americans are not talking about it enough in the ways that matter.

Staying tight-lipped about money is something people may no longer be able to afford. Today, the average American holds a debt balance of $96,371. Student loan borrowers owe a collective $1.76 trillion. Home equity has proven elusive, with only 27% of millennials saying they own a place. And 32% of Americans would have trouble finding $400 in cash to pay for an emergency.

If conversation is a currency on the pathway to financial security, it’s time to start speaking up.

• Money is the monster under the bed in many homes – and it’s time to turn on the lights: More than half of Americans say they never talked about finances growing up, and 1 in 4 learned that it’s not polite to talk about money. Another 35% of Americans say they were taught to never ask someone how much money they make. Respondents report being raised without practical, critical money lessons like budgeting (32%), saving for retirement (21%), negotiating a salary (18%), or investing (17%). 
• There’s no such thing as a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, but when it comes to money, it’s much easier for Americans to believe in magic: 71% of Americans have purchased a lottery ticket and 1 in 4 millennials turn to a fortune teller for advice, and yet only one third of Americans have spoken with a financial advisor.
• Financial knowledge is power – and many Americans could benefit from taking stock: Just six in 10 Americans know their own net worth (58%), and only 38% know their partner’s. More people are familiar with Elon Musk’s net worth (28%) than their own family’s (24%). Having clarity around your full financial picture (40%), talking to an advisor (36%), and financial education (34%) can be critical to achieving success.
• Pay transparency could redefine the modern work experience and motivate people to work harder: Americans avoid uncomfortable money talk at work (68%), but wish discussing salaries wasn’t taboo (56%), stating it would help avoid miscommunications (60%) and motivate them to work harder (50%). To help with potential career opportunities, 34% of Americans, including over half of Gen Z (53%) and Millennials (58%), would share their salary information on their LinkedIn.​
• More candid “money talks” have the power to change the world: 66% believe that open money conversations can help more people achieve financial freedom and can help people build generational wealth. Six in 10 say it can help improve the gender wage gap (62%) and over half say that open money conversations can improve workplace transparency (56%).

Key stats:

• Growing pains: 1 in 4 Americans were taught it’s impolite to talk about finances and only 32% learned how to budget while growing up.  
• Stressed out: A third of Americans regularly worry about money. 
• Mirror, mirror: 43% of Americans say they have prepared for a money conversation by practicing in the mirror or writing down their thoughts ahead of time.  
• Would you rather: More than a quarter of Americans (29%) would rather wait in line at the DMV, sit on jury duty (27%), miss a flight (26%), or have a TV show spoiled (26%) than tell a stranger how much money they have.  

Break open the piggy bank 

Don’t talk about money: that’s the message half (52%) of Americans hear, learning it’s impolite to talk about finances (26%), and certainly not what you earn (35%). The taboo prevails for two-thirds (60%) of people who don’t feel comfortable on the topic.

Americans recall stowing away coins in a piggy bank (41%) but say many practical financial lessons weren’t discussed – like the importance of having an emergency fund (31%), building good credit (30%), and managing debt (27%) – as kids or adults. This might explain why Americans tend to clam up when the conversation turns to money. While many received an allowance (36%), the majority (68%) were never taught how to manage a budget. Nearly a quarter of Gen Zers (23%) grew up in a household with a swear jar teaching about money and manners – yet 79% of all people say they never spoke about how much is “needed” to be financially secure.

YOLO

One in 5 (18%) Americans surveyed say they were raised with a YOLO money motto: “You only live once, so don’t worry too much about finances.” Despite the saying, more than a third (37%) say they regularly worry. That’s even higher for Gen Z and Millennials (51% and 49%) and women, who are considerably more stressed about their personal finances than men (42% vs. 33%).

Less than a quarter discussed saving in a 401(k) (21%), salary negotiation (18%), or investing in the stock market (17%), critical lessons that could alleviate some anxiety in their adult years. When it comes to the stock market, 75% of men vs. 50% of women say they understand how it works. All this silence may come at a cost, leading to increased uncertainty about opening up: 43% of Americans admit to having practiced a money conversation in the mirror before the real thing.

Let’s change the subject

People are more open about polarizing subjects like politics (43%), existential topics (32%), or even relationship advice (31%) – before conversing about cash. People prefer dishing about their favorite food (57%), what they watched on Netflix (46%), or celebrity news (28%) over sharing their financial plans (24%).

Ever hear the phrase, time is money? Not to the more than a quarter of Americans (29%) who would rather wait in line at the DMV, sit on jury duty (27%), or miss a flight (26%) than reveal how much money they have in the bank. Nearly a third (28%) would rather give a big presentation at work, and 17% would prefer a blind date to showing their financial statements. More than a quarter of Americans would rather have a movie, TV show or book spoiled than share how much is in their coffers.

Asked but not answered 

Besides their spouse or partner, less than half of Americans talk about their personal finances with their own family (49%), friends (35%), financial advisor (34%), or a coworker (12%). And while 70% of Americans think money conversations should be kept private, the vast majority (86%) have at least one question about money on their minds. ​“How do I make more money?” (67%) and “How much money do I need for retirement?” (63%) are two of the biggest ones asked today.​ Nearly half (44%) say they never talk about how much money they have or how much they need to be financially secure (44%), even though 65% feel confident about their long-term plan.

Key stats:

• Raise (the conversation): One third (33%) of Americans don’t feel comfortable asking for a pay raise, and yet more than half (56%) wish discussing salaries wasn’t taboo.
• Clairvoyant cash seekers: 1 in 4 millennials consult a fortune teller for financial guidance, yet just 33% of people have turned to a financial advisor for advice.
• #1 money mistake: Not saving enough for the future, according to 41%. 
• Going public: 34% of Americans would share their salary information on their LinkedIn to help find career opportunities.

Let’s circle back on that 

Figuring out personal finance is intimidating and overwhelming for half of Americans (48%), and when it comes to managing their money, 39% say they don’t know where to start, including 41% of women and 37% men. Compare that with sky-high confidence managing money at work: 73% feel at ease overseeing company budgets and the majority say they clearly understand their employer’s finances and performance (70%).

Reassuringly, people have a strong grasp on employer benefits like the availability of their company’s 401(k) plan (80%) and say they know how their pay raises work (77%). Advocating for themselves is where it gets tricky – one third (33%) of people don’t feel comfortable asking for an increase. Men feel more comfortable asking for a pay raise than women (74% vs. 59%). Better market data on compensation could potentially boost negotiation confidence, and nearly half (49%) of survey respondents (and a majority of Millennials 69% and Gen Z 71%) believe discussing salaries can lead to better career opportunities.

Despite the rise of wage transparency legislation in many states, Americans say they avoid uncomfortable money talk at work (68%), and more than half (56%) wish discussing salaries wasn’t taboo. Some 44% are browsing job listings in states with pay transparency laws to compare salaries, including 72% of Gen Z and 64% of Millennials.

Not at this water cooler  

Do you know how much your coworkers make? Just 19% of respondents say they’ve asked. But the workplace isn’t the only area Americans are staying quiet. People haven’t asked their friends (68%) or family (60%) either. Women are less comfortable talking about money with coworkers than men (36% women vs. 50% men).

That said, people may not be as shy as expected: 58% of Millennials and 53% of Gen Z (and 34% of Americans overall), would share their salary information on their LinkedIn.

What’s it amount to? According to 62% of respondents, open money conversations could solve the gender wage gap. Americans say greater wage transparency would motivate employees to work harder (50%) and help avoid miscommunications (60%).

Feeling lucky

Comparison may be the thief of joy, and whether it’s keeping up with the Joneses (or Kardashians), many Americans say they look around and often wonder “where do people get the money” when they’re scrolling social media (60%) or comparing themselves to their real-life social circles (64%).

Given many people’s “say less” mentality, it’s no wonder Americans flock to the internet and social media for advice, including two thirds (66%) of those surveyed. Leaving no stone unturned, Americans seek a variety of sources for money advice, including 24% of Millennials who say they regularly turn to fortune tellers for guidance.

Believing in magic doesn't seem too far-fetched when 71% of Americans say they have purchased a lottery ticket — compare that to just one-third (33%) who have turned to a financial advisor.

Biggest mistakes and crypto’s big bet 

We all make mistakes. Eight in 10 Americans (83%) admit to making at least one money mistake, with not saving enough for the future (41%), accumulating too much debt (36%), and not having an emergency fund (34% overall, 41% women, 28% men) being the most common. Some 18% say they missed out by not investing in a 401(k).

More than half of Millennials and Gen Z (52% and 51%) rely on buy-now-pay-later plans when making bigger purchases they can’t afford otherwise. With debt so high up on the money mistakes list, nearly half of Americans (47%) confess that filing for bankruptcy wouldn’t be the worst thing to happen to them. 

Of those surveyed, more men admit to having taken on too much risk with their investments (23% men vs. 14% women) but many people don’t want to miss their chance on cryptocurrency, either. Nearly half (45%) of Americans say new currencies are the future and an important part of a financial portfolio (39%). More men invest in crypto for extra income than women (21% vs 9%), and 36% overall believe crypto and NFTs will surpass fiat currency in popularity. Yet, the vast majority acknowledge that they don’t understand them (67%) and see these assets as a gamble (81%). Don’t go at it alone, say 68%, indicating it may be useful to work with a financial professional for advice.

Side hustle hedges 

Half (52%) of Americans are also betting on their futures by turning to a side hustle or second job as a way to generate more income.  Younger generations are more likely to have tried a side gig, with 78% of Gen Z and Millennials picking up a second gig to make more money.

Key stats:   

• Gray area: Americans are unsure about how much to spend on a wedding gift (67%), negotiating with a dealer to buy a car (67%), and whether or not to get a prenup (59%). 
• Rounding up: 64% of Americans are unsure whether or not to round to the nearest dollar amount when paying someone back using Venmo or Zelle. 
• Reality check: More people are familiar with Elon Musk’s net worth (28%) than their own family’s (24%). 
• Get the bag: Millennials and Gen Z prefer using the money mouth face and money bag when texting.

Financial faux pas  

Everyday money etiquette can be tricky, and people often aren’t sure what to do when money enters the chat. Americans confess they’re uncertain navigating spending money in a variety of situations, whether it’s buying a wedding gift (67%), negotiating with a dealer to buy a car (67%), splitting a bill at a restaurant on a first date (56%), budgeting for a vacation (56%), and tipping (54%). The payment playbook is especially tough for Gen Z, who say they’re unsure how to divide rent (72%) and how to split a bill among friends at a restaurant or bar (61%).

These money maneuvers may remain a mystery, considering more than a quarter of Americans (28%) feel they will be judged for asking money questions, such as talking about budgets. Half of Americans (52%, and 70% Gen Z, 67% Millennials) say they’ve avoided taking vacations with friends out of concern they don't have the same budget, from the price point for a destination, to experiences like which restaurants to visit on the trip.

Nearly half of Americans (46%) say they’re uncomfortable asking a person to pay them back, and prefer requesting their cash using digital payments like Venmo or Zelle (51%). Modern solutions have modern dilemmas, too. Two-thirds of Americans (64%) are uncertain whether to round to the nearest dollar amount when using digital wallet payments.

When it comes to spending, other social situations Americans find uncomfortable include joining a fantasy football league (61%), joining a bridal or groomsman party (45%), and being asked to donate to a specific charity (36%).

Net worth in your network 

Pop culture influences everyday life – especially when it comes to money. So much so that Americans are more familiar with Elon Musk’s net worth (28%) than their own family’s (24%). In fact, just six in 10 Americans know their own net worth (58%), and only 38% know their partner’s.

Gen Z knows the most about how much celebrities make, counting coins for Jeff Bezos (47%), Beyonce (41%), Tom Brady (35%), and Kim Kardashian (33%) vs. knowing the net worth of their friends (26%), family (24%), or coworkers (20%).

So how much do Americans have? Let’s take a look at net worth, according to data from Empower Personal Dashboard™ and from The Fed.

Median net worth by age. Source: The Fed - Chart: Survey of Consumer Finances, 1989 - 2019 

Scrub the subscriptions  

Mo’ money, less problems – at least that’s what most Americans surveyed believe. Some 61% of people believe that more money would make their problems go away (80% Millennials and 75% Gen Z), so many are cutting back on expenses. More than half (55%) of Americans have trimmed subscriptions like Netflix and Spotify to save more money; Millennials (67%) and Gen Z (66%) have scaled back the most.  

One place they’re not cutting back? Dining out. According to Empower Personal Dashboard™ user dashboard data (January 2023), restaurant spend continues to increase to all-time highs following the pandemic. Other increases include travel, groceries, and entertainment.

What your emoji says about you

While Americans avoid financial facetime – it’s not stopping them from texting. The classic dollar sign emoji is the most popular overall, but what people hit send on most might just reveal their age. The tech-forward trendsetter generations Millennials and Gen Z prefer using the money bag and money mouth face emojis more often.

Financial freedom is...

To a third of people, financial freedom is just as much about being able to go on vacation when they want (28%) as it is about the classic American dream of owning a home (29%). And almost the same amount of people define it as having at least three months of basic expenses saved (25%) vs. having a source of passive income (23%).

For most, financial freedom isn't about dining out whenever (13%) or having the latest iPhone (7%). It’s about being debt-free (54%), having a comfortable lifestyle (50%), and retiring at their goal age (30%). Those are lofty goals when nearly half (49%) admit to being more focused on the here and now vs. long-term success.

Money Talks: the bottom line 

More than three-quarters (77%) of Americans want to see society take on more “money talks” about ways to save for the future (41%), money mistakes they’ve made (36%) and basic financial literacy (34%).​ A quarter want more discussions about how to negotiate (26%) and pay for big expenses (24%). Even more open dialogue about the emotional aspects of money would be helpful for 20% of respondents. 

Ultimately, people believe more open conversations about money can have a truly transformative effect on society: 66% think it can help more people achieve financial freedom. 

So, how does America get there? Respondents agree that clarity about their financial picture (40%), talking to an advisor (36%), and financial education (34%) are key to achieving financial success.  

We all have questions about money. Isn’t it time we talked it out?

Money Talkers vs. Money Whisperers  

The survey discovered Americans are likely to fall into one of two groups, based on whether or not they’re fluent in financial conversations:  

• Money Talkers: More confident and comfortable chatting about everyday financial topics in life, work, and play. They easily navigate all kinds of social situations that involve money – from being vocal about vacation budgets with their friends to speaking up when someone asks “Will you be my bridesmaid?”  Money Talkers set the tone at work and know how to use their voice to ask for a raise. They have peace of mind about their money because they have clarity on their short- and long-term financial goals – and know how they’ll get there. The takeaway: Money Talkers believe conversations about money are their own kind of currency – the kind that you cash in for financial freedom.
• Money Whisperers: Unsure and uncomfortable, this group would much rather change the subject when it comes to financial conversations in life, work and play. They are typically tight-lipped and frequently commit financial faux pas – don’t look to them for guidance when the seven-person dinner party gets the bill! Whether they’re embarrassed, afraid of making a mistake or just too far outside their comfort zone, Money Whisperers tend to stay hush hush. And if they quietly seek unconventional financial wisdom from a psychic, we predict the convo will be a bit …unreliable. But there is one phrase Money Whisperers do love to say: zip it. The takeaway: Money Whisperers avoid money conversations at all costs – to the detriment of securing a brighter financial future. The good news: it’s not too late to become a Money Talker – Empower is here to help. 

Money Talkers spend more time planning for the future, and less worrying and stressing about their finances. Which will you be?

*Methodology: This survey was conducted by The Harris Poll on behalf of Empower from January 3 to January 10, 2023, surveying 2,000 Americans ages 18+.